THE INNOCENCE OF DOUCHE BAGS?!?!

Each month we at Boom Bap Radio will bestow  the award of “The Douchey McDouche Bag” award on the biggest dickheads in the news.  This category is not limited to politicians or entertainers or even athletes – there’s room for everyone on this bench.

However, each month one person stands out as the absolute winner of our coveted prize.

The award is based on the name I gave a menial worker from a big box department store, who insisted that my item was no longer in stock without looking. This douche actually made me order the item online and had a whole five minute explanation of why the product was not available days after Christmas. Evidently it was shipped back to some remote warehouse – over the hills and far, far away.

Imagine my surprise when about an hour later –while walking to the other end of the store I found piles of my item, neatly stacked and very much available.

So this one goes out to that collared shirt wonder, who obviously knew nothing, but before he knew a whole friggin’ lot –Douche Bag!! Hey dickwad - this award  goes out to you  – You Douche!!!

The September 2012 Douchey McDouche Bag Award

 

In a little over a year of handing out our patented “Douchey McDouche Bag Award,” there has only been one time where a circumstance was awarded over an actual individual.

However, that all changed on the anniversary of the September 11th attacks this year, and we again had to award not an individual, but – “A Douchey Situation.”

Our monthly award in September technically goes to convicted felon and movie producer Nakoula Basseley Nakoula; his partner, California insurance salesman Steve Klein and whoever else funded and distributed the disrespectful “Innocence of Muslims” movie.

The world learned of the film last month when a 15-minute trailer was released on YouTube and unabashedly mocked and disrespected the worshippers of Islam and its prophet Mohammad.

The controversial film, and I use that term loosely, has only been shown to exist by way of a 15-minute trailer on the internet, but somehow in early September it became literally all the rage in countries across Middle East.

Viewed on the internet, the release spurred demonstrations at the American Embassys in Yemen and Egypt and riots in several Middle Eastern countries including: Iran, Iraq, Israel, parts of the Palestinian territories and Morocco, right around September 11th.

As angry worshippers rioted over the images of this douchey instant classic, it was an attack on the US consulate in Libya on September 11th that defined this incident as one in need of a warm vinegar and water spritz.

The Sept. 11, 2012 bombing attack in Benghazi led to the death of US Ambassador to Libya J. Christopher Stevens, former US Navy SEALs Glen Doherty and Tyrone Woods, computer operator Sean Smith and about 10 Libyans. It was initially linked to the protests held on the same day allegedly caused by the cheesy film.

The fatal attack on a US consulate in Libya has since become an election year football for folks from the Right, who blame President Obama for not bolstering security at the bungalow in Benghazi prior to the attacks.

First of all, to call the making of this divisive film, douchey is an understatement at best.

It appears, this less than stellar flick was only created to insult Muslims and inflame tensions in a region that had just survived the growing pains of “Arab Spring,” and vast changes of government leaders hip just months earlier.  The filmmakers had to know that depicting the Prophet in any way, shape and form would be an absolute smite to those who worship Islam.

So by just portraying the Islamic Prophet Mohammad and worse yet, in a less than holy way, put these douche bags in the running.  But, the portrayal of the holy figure as a womanizer and a con man while trying to distribute it for profit made it a Douchey McDouche Bag awardee.

Things first started getting funky in 2009 when Klein and a man he identified as Sam Bassiel, or Basile, or better yet, Bacile, held a casting call in the BackStage publication for a film called “Desert Warrior.”

At the time, Nakoula was running an $800,000 bank fraud scheme that saw the shady character opening bank accounts under phony names and transferring cash between them ultimately withdrawing the funds before the checks bounced.

For his lucrative swindle, Nakoula earned him 21-months in jail and was forced to pay back the stolen money after pleading guilty to bank fraud. He remained between jail and a half-way house until the summer of 2011. By the Fall of last year, shooting for his flick began with a group of people that allegedly included porn director Alan Roberts (of The Happy Hooker fame) crude costumes, a green-screen, and what has been estimated as fewer than 100 actors.

Nakoula, then, allegedly posing as Sam Bacile, duped actors into performing in a low-budget flick about Middle Eastern warriors around the time of Christ. At least two actors, who were paid to perform, have filed lawsuits against the film and its creators.

Cindy Lee Garcia, an actress who worked on the film, said when film was shot everyone was led to believe it was for Desert Warrior,” however, she said before it was released, a new soundtrack was laid and new anti-Muslim theme was dubbed over the original dialogue in Arabic.

Garcia filed an application for a temporary restraining order and preliminary injunction in California Superior Court against Nakoula and YouTube.

Initial reports from the White House linked the attacks on the Embassy in Egypt and the Consulate in Libya to reactions from the film. The President referred to hunting down those responsible and denounced the obvious terrorist attack.

Then things got really funked up!

Noukola hid out in his Cerritos, California home, worshippers called for American blood and Mitt Romney got all inappropriate and sketchy – up in here, up in here!

Just hours after the attacks in Libya and Egypt, the GOP candidate issued a press statement that responded to statements from those from the Egyptian Embassy that condemned the film and somehow tied those statements to the White House.

Romney then held a press conference, hours later, where he said the Egyptian statements sympathized with intolerance and The President was somehow apologizing for American values. Romney further charged the Obama Administration of sending mixed signals to the world.

Now here’s where I got confused.

Initially, most of the GOP distanced themselves from the Romney on his stance and castigated him for politicizing the tragedy at Libya. Then, shortly before the Republican National Convention, the attack resurfaced as a political issue and as indictment of “weak foreign policy” by the Obama Administration.

A month later, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton took “responsibility” for the attacks and again vowed to hunt down those responsible.

Libyan President, yeah, who knew there was one after Gaddafi, Mohammad al-Magarief said the attack was the work of “experienced masterminds,” and suspected al-Qaeda.

Noukola was later arrested for violating his probation and sent back to the pokey, but this crappy film and the attacks in Libya just won’t go away.

Does anyone remember the 1998 Embassy attacks in Kenya and Tanzania?

How about the Consulate in Karachi in 2002 or the Uzbekistan in 2004?

How about the attacks on Embassies in Saudi Arabia and Syria in 2004 and 2006 respectively?

Of course not, those happened under Presidents Clinton and Bush, but somehow, despite the deaths of countless security people and diplomats, those attacks never produced  questions about the President until now – I can’t imagine why.

Ironically, security forces under President Obama hunted down and killed terrorist Fazul Abdullah last year. Adbullah was identified as the bomber responsible for the 1998 attacks in Africa.

But Let’s not Forget the Opportunists

Remember that crazy looking Reverend dude Terry Jones from Gainesville, Fla, who was burning the Koran?

He promoted the abomination of a film along with producer Steve Klein, who was identified by the Southern Poverty Law Center , as a combat trainer for religious extremists and tied to the Minuteman movement. Klein is also alleged to be the founder of Courageous Christians United, which demonstrates outside of abortion clinics, Mormon temples and mosques.

Ironically, Mittens said during the secret tape released earlier this year, that he awaited an international incident on which to pounce in order to debase the Obama presidency – I guess he found it.

He actually boasted about meeting murdered Navy SEAL Glen Doherty while skiing near his home in La Jolla, California several years ago. Doherty’s mother told the Mitt-ster to stop using her dead son as part of his political agenda.

A friend of Dohery’s remembered the meeting with Romney as “insincere and stale.” Elf Ellefsen said Mittens introduced himself to Doherty as, “Mitt Romney, a political figure,” no fewer than four times each time with the same opening lines.

Mittens dropped mention of the meeting in early October.

However, somewhere between the death and chaos, came politics, opportunity and a political football of which only the makers “Wag the Dog,” could be proud.

These jack-off filmmakers decided to throw gasoline on a fire of mistrust and intolerance and put this piece of chit on the internet – under the guise … of art and for that alone they are Douche Bags.

But for the degradation of a religion and a people as well as the creation of a political situation, you have to be lauded. So congrats! You’re winner of the Boom Bap Radio Douchey McDouche Bag Award for September 2012.

Have a free rubber bag and vinegar on us – you Douche Bags!

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